As I am unexpectally going through a divorce, I have given a lot of thought to this concept of marriage. Please bare with me as I fumble through to try and express my thoughts and feelings.
I don't have a huge circle of people in my life but I am blessed to have the people I do have in my life. I have a lot of family members but we aren't close to everyone. My immediate family members are the ones I've had unconditional love for and from since always. There isn't a question, worry, or concern when it comes to these people in my life. I love them for always, no matter what. The relationship you have with your parents and siblings is so natural and without conditions or stipulations. I know this isn't true for all families but for us it is.
November 7, 2012 is the day that I became a mother and my, without a doubt, unconditional love was born. There isn't even a question about my love for him. It is just automatic. If you are a mother then you know exactly what I'm saying and will understand how hard it is to explain.
When you have a family with a husband, wife, and a child there is a lot of love there but the love is different. I believe the reason they say put your spouse before your child is because the relationship you have with your spouse takes work in order for that love to stay and grow. The relationship you have with your child is just an automatic love and it's easy to put that relationship first because it feels natural so it's just easier.
My parents love me unconditionally, as do my siblings, my nephew, and my son Jack. I know there are women and men who probably love their spouse unconditionally, who regardless of what the other did would forgive them, but for most spouses there is something that could break that bond.
Marriage is tricky. Oh how I wish it was as easy as I once thought. I believed you loved it each other and that was it. I grew up surrounded in love and didn't know any other way. Now I know different.
Monday, October 13, 2014
Since Jack and I are staying with my parents, we are able to spend even more time with Bennett. My sister, her husband, and their son Bennett are also living with my parents while their house is being built. Yes, there is a house full but it is great!
From all of this togetherness between Jack and Bennett I've learned that boys are odd creatures. Put two boys together and the odd factor increases.
Here are some things I just don't get about boys:
1. Climbing into the toy box is way more fun than any toy inside.
2. One minute one boy can barely tap the other and there is a total meltdown. The next minute the same boy can slap the fire out of the other and they die laughing.
3. Crashing their cars into each other causes a laughing riot like no other.
4. Except for splashing water out of the tub which is hilarious and when it lands on me and I say "stop it" the boys just can't stop the belly laughing. Evil little things :)
5. The word booty causes happiness, dancing, and laughter that only boys understand.
6. Those two boys tie up like no ones business but man oh man do they love each other. Out of nowhere Bennett will say "I love you Jack" or Jack will lean over and give Bennett a huge hug. Of course, two seconds later they are fighting over a toy neither of them want.
7. Attention, good or bad, has to be fair. If Jack jumps in the recliner and we tell him to get down. We already know that Bennett is going to do it next just so we can tell him to get down too.
8. They love, love, love to annoy each other and make the other one scream. I thought girls were known for their screetching tantrums but these boys could beat out any girl.
9. Being naked is fun. Running naked is even better. Running naked with a towel as a cape equals the most fun ever. Wrestling them to get their clothes on is not so fun for mamas.
10. They don't sit still very often, so getting sweet cuddles come in fleeting moments, but when they are sweet and loving there is nothing like it. The way a son loves his mama is an undescribable love. I will also say my relationship with my nephew Bennett is a strong one. It makes me one happy Lala that he and I are so close. Hopefully, we will always have that strong bond.
Bennett and Jack keep us on our toes. You never know when they are going toward each other if they are going to slap each other or hug. Boys are just odd. Maybe girls are too, but since we have no ribbons and bows to compare them to, I'm just gonna have to go with that boys are odd.
Do these behaviors describe little boys you know or are the girls you know just as odd?